Femonster

Two twenty-something feminists fighting patriarchy one blogpost at a time

Posts tagged rape culture

15,535 notes &

revathereafter:

never touch anything with half of your heart: This is how this shit works:

lesbianese:

  • When a person of color says that they hate white people, they hate white people as an institution (aka white supremacy/hegemony)
  • When a woman says that they hate men, they hate men as an institution (aka male dominance/patriarchy)
  • When a queer person says that they hate…

Filed under feminism gender equality sexism misogyny misandry women's rights male privilege victim blaming slut shaming rape culture men's rights mra men's rights activists rape sexual violence violence sexual assault assault patriarchy queued

2 notes &

TW:Rape. Raped, pregnant and ordeal not over


When faced with the choice between a lifetime tethered to her rapist or meaningful legal redress, the answer may be easy, but it is not painless. For the sake of her child, the woman will sacrifice her need to see her once immensely powerful perpetrator humbled by the court.

I know it because I lived it. I went to law school to learn how to stop it.

Having fought this injustice for the past several years, I have come to believe that ignorance is to blame for this legal absence. Opponents argue no woman would ever choose to raise the child she conceived through rape. The only two studies to analyze the choices made by pregnant raped women indicate otherwise — at least 30% of women who conceive by rape make this choice.

Others argue that no rapist would ever seek parental rights. Not only does my experience and that of others I know prove otherwise, but it is not surprising that a man who cruelly degrades a woman would also seek to torture her in an even more agonizing way, by seeking access to her child.

Filed under rape akin rape culture law I dont want to live on this planet anymore

4,905 notes &

[#slurs, #cissexism, #racism, #fatphobia, #rape culture] The Top 6 Reasons Why You Should Hate Dan Savage

forgetpolitics:

1. Dan Savage hates trans people and uses transphobic slurs.

“Children have a right to some stability and constancy from the adults in their lives. Perhaps I’m a transphobic bigot, but I honestly think waiting a measly 36 months to cut your dick is a sacrifice any father should be willing to make for his 15-year-old son. Call me old-fashioned.

Unfortunately, your ex wasn’t willing to make that sacrifice (selfish tranny!), or it never occurred to him to make that sacrifice (stupid tranny!)…. If your son can’t deal with having his dad/mom/whatever around right now, support him and tell his dad/mom/whatever to leave the two of you alone for the time being.”

2. Dan Savage believes that bisexuals do not and should not exist.

“I’m not saying bi guys are bad people, or they don’t make great one-night stands. Bushes, bathhouses, and sleazy gay bars are crawling with bi guys. But if a guy wants more, he’ll have an easier time getting it from another gay man.”

3. Dan Savage has admonished women for not putting up with their partner’s sexual desires and has criticized female rape survivors’ stories.

There the guy was, boned for you, and he was brave enough to put his desires out there, to make himself vulnerable (which is what the ladies are always saying they want, right?), and you lobbed the ol’ “What?!?” bomb at him and made him feel like a freak. Is it any wonder that he quickly moved on to “other things” and, one would hope, better sex partners?”

I’m extremely sorry that you were raped, DRARS, although your baseless accusations of rape make me doubt you when you claim to be a survivor of rape. The feminist bloggers are going to accuse me of thought crimes: If a woman says she was raped then, by God, she was raped. (Tell it to the lacrosse team.) But if my reaction to your letter is a thought crime, I can only plead entrapment: I wouldn’t have had these illegal thoughts if you hadn’t sent me such a stupid letter in the first place… Finally, DRARS, I hereby withdraw my consent for you to read Savage Love. If you continue to read my column against my will, well, we all know what word to apply to your actions.”

4. Dan Savage thinks that racist gay white men are less of a threat to African-Americans than homophobic African-Americans are to gay people.

“I do know this, though: I’m done pretending that the handful of racist gay white men out there—and they’re out there, and I think they’re scum—are a bigger problem for African Americans, gay and straight, than the huge numbers of homophobic African Americans are for gay Americans, whatever their color.”

EDIT: Here are some more lovely gems from our resident asshole Dan Savage on his rampant hatred for everything not white, male, and gay:

5. Dan Savage thinks asexuals are secretly “fags”.

“I appreciate the feedback, Stephanie, and I’m sorry I offended you. But… um… I couldn’t help but think, as I read your letter, that your boyfriend is either a fool or a fag. But if it works for you guys—if a romantic relationship devoid of sexual attraction and activity works for you guys—then it works for you guys. Who am I to argue with success?”

6. Dan Savage is fatphobic.

“First off, LARDASS, you neglected to include a sign-off, forcing me to create one for you. I tried to create one that captured the spirit and tone of your letter, and I think I did pretty well… I am thoroughly annoyed at having my tame statements of fact—being heavy is a health risk; rolls of exposed flesh are unsightly—characterized as ‘hate speech.’”

(via vanillaandlavender)

Filed under dan savage cissexism rape culture patriarchy

5 notes &

rags2bitchez asked: "We are not equal. I think this needs to change." So you get called sugar-tits now and then. When was the last time the police beat you up for being a woman? Rape has nothing to do with patriarchal values within the rapist, and acting like it's a something that the feminist movement will purge from society doesnt make sense to me. Im not upset im just trying to understand how someone can look at the world we live in and think that patriarchy is a problem. It seems like more of a nuisance.

Maybe the police aren’t beating me for being a woman, but my husband/boyfriend/friend/date/someone I met at a party is.

Violence against women (and members of the LGBTQA community) is a societal problem, promoted by rape culture.

From http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape_culture

According to the rape culture theory, acts of sexism are commonly employed to validate and rationalize normative misogynistic practices. For instance, sexist jokes may be told to foster disrespect for women and an accompanying disregard for their well-being. An example would be a female rape victim being blamed for her being raped because of how she dressed or acted. In rape culture, sexualized violence towards women is regarded as a continuum in a society that regards women’s bodies as sexually available by default.[6]

The root cause of rape culture is generally agreed to be the “domination and objectification of women”.[7] However, academic theory holds that rape culture does not necessarily have a single cause, and causes may be localized based on other social aspects of culture.[8] For example, in South Africa the overriding “war culture” which emphasized masculinity and violence led to a culture in which rape was normalized.[7][5] A University of California Davis public document alleged that the enforcement of the following of social rules by women and the conditioning of gender roles were major causes.[9] In a study of date rape, gender-based miscommunications were held to be a major factor supporting a campus rape culture.[10] The general unwillingness of police and district attorneys to prosecute rapes where force was not involved or where the victim had some sort of relationship with the aggressor is also cited as a motivation for date rape and campus rape.[8] Rape culture is also closely related to slut-shaming and victim blaming, where rape victims are considered at fault for being raped, and it is argued that this connection is due to the presence of a culture that shames all female sexuality.[8] That some rapes are not reported to the police due to fear that they would not be believed is often cited as a symptom of a rape culture,[11][8] that they thought the police would not believe them is cited as a reason by 6% of women who did not report rape.[12]

Although its use as a theory to explain the occurrence of rape and domestic violence was focused on the rape of women, rape culture has been described as detrimental to men as well as women. Some writers and speakers, such as Jackson Katz, Michael Kimmel, and Don McPherson, have said that it is intrinsically linked to gender roles that limit male self-expression and cause psychological harm to men

Rape DOES have to do with patriarchal values in SOCIETY, and the rapist lives in and has been socialized in a society that promotes rape culture. The feminist movement is working to bring awareness to this, and create a more equal culture. Cultures in which men and women are more equal have less partner and domestic violence.

From The Truth about Rape
 By Robert N. Golden, Fred L. Peterson, Ph.D., Kathryn Hilgenkamp, Judith Harper, Elizabeth Boskey

The classic study of the effect of culture on rape was performed by the anthropologist Peggy Reeves Sanday in 1981. In her book Female Power and Male Dominance: On the Origins of Sexual Inequality, Sanday classified societies as either rape-free or rape-prone. Rape-free societies tended to be those in which women and men contributed equally to the community. They also tended to encourage children to value nurturing emotions and avoid aggression. In contrast, Sanday found that rape-prone societies had more separation of sex roles and that they tended to respect, or at least tolerate, male violence and aggression. These results have been confirmed by other scientists. The 2005 World Health Organization (WHO) multicountry report on domestic violence and women’s health found several societal factors that increased a woman’s risk of gender-based violence. These include how equal men and women are economically, as well as confirming most of the other factors identified by Sanday in her groundbreaking work…In the words on the WHO report, “Challenging the social norms that condone and therefore perpetuate violence against women is a responsibility for us all.” Rape, sexual assault, and all forms of violence against women may be crimes committed by individuals, but they are crimes shaped by society. Changing the way that societies view, and treat, women would be a more effective way of preventing gender-based violence than any amount of criminal prosecution.

(bolding is mine)

Patriarchy is a problem, and it is hurting men just as it is hurting women.

http://www.safercampus.org/blog/2011/03/essential-concepts-how-patriarchy-and-rape-culture-hurt-men/

This is a great list of ways in which patriarchy hurts men, and I suggest you give it a read.

Filed under feminism rape culture rape patriarchy oppression equality patriarchy hurts men too

16 notes &

Stomp & Holler, Northampton MA. October 22, 2011.
Sign reads: You only call me a “slut”  because you’re afraid of my sexuality
Sign reads: I holler & stomp because:
1 in 4 college women will experience actual or attempted sexual assault during their college careers
1 in 3 women will experience interpersonal violence in their lifetime
I have been told that I am not as good as a man
My friends and loved ones are survivors of sexual violence
I have been taught that my clothes speak louder than me
0 in all people deserve to be raped, victimized or silenced.

Stomp & Holler, Northampton MA. October 22, 2011.

Sign reads: You only call me a “slut”  because you’re afraid of my sexuality

Sign reads: I holler & stomp because:

1 in 4 college women will experience actual or attempted sexual assault during their college careers

1 in 3 women will experience interpersonal violence in their lifetime

I have been told that I am not as good as a man

My friends and loved ones are survivors of sexual violence

I have been taught that my clothes speak louder than me

0 in all people deserve to be raped, victimized or silenced.

Filed under stomp and holler northampton slutwalk signs sexuality rape culture feminism

778 notes &

Stomp & Holler, Northampton MA. October 22, 2011
Sign reads: 1 in 3 Native and Alaskan Native American women are raped at some point in their lives. That’s 13% more than the national average for all women in the US. 86% of the violators are white males.
Most victims do NOT recieve justice and are victimized. America continues to appropriate and hyper sexualize Native culture.
I am Seneca. Native women must be heard. American culture enables the targeting of Native women and disregards justice for us.
FIGHT RAPE CULTURE & MISOGYNY FOR EVERYONE!ON ALL FRONTS!

Stomp & Holler, Northampton MA. October 22, 2011

Sign reads: 1 in 3 Native and Alaskan Native American women are raped at some point in their lives. That’s 13% more than the national average for all women in the US. 86% of the violators are white males.

Most victims do NOT recieve justice and are victimized. America continues to appropriate and hyper sexualize Native culture.

I am Seneca. Native women must be heard. American culture enables the targeting of Native women and disregards justice for us.

FIGHT RAPE CULTURE & MISOGYNY FOR EVERYONE!
ON ALL FRONTS!

Filed under stomp and holler northampton slutwalk sign native women rape culture racism feminism